


The Diner (or: Unbreakable Frank Castle)

by ohsinnerman



Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, Gen, I don't even know what or why this is, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-16
Updated: 2018-05-16
Packaged: 2019-05-07 14:57:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14673504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohsinnerman/pseuds/ohsinnerman
Summary: Frank and Karen run into some friends of Frank's. Those friends being Titus Andromedon and Mikey Politano.





	The Diner (or: Unbreakable Frank Castle)

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I don't know if y'all saw those pictures of Jon Bernthal and Titus Burgess, but I did and then I had two martinis and then this happened. I just love the idea of Frank being totally overwhelmed and kind of amused and swept along by Titus' personality.  
> (I haven't re-watched Kimmy Schmidt in a while, so I hope my Titus is okay. He's already such an exaggerated character, but I apologize if he comes off as a caricature at all. This was just for fun!!)

“Peter Castiglio-whatever your ridiculous name is, I cannot believe you!”

Both Karen and Frank jump a little in their booth. Their weekly breakfasts (neither one was exactly sure how they had become ‘weekly,’ but neither regretted it) were usually quiet affairs; the same diner, the same waitress who didn’t look too closely or ask too many questions. They definitely aren’t used to people calling them by name—fake or otherwise.

Frank’s eyes shoot towards the door and he murmurs “Hoo boy,” just before Karen turns around. A round-faced black man in a beautiful blue pashmina and a floral shirt is stalking towards them, followed by a slightly embarrassed white guy, fiddling nervously with his hands. Next thing Karen knows, the man in the pashmina is at their table, fists on his hips, glaring at Frank.

Frank also looks a little embarrassed, but he’s smiling in the small way he does. “My name’s ridiculous?” he says, and the man rolls his eyes.

“Don’t you try to change the subject. You’ve cancelled on me and Mikey twice in the past… I don’t even know! I have never felt more mistreated in my _life_.” The man’s still scowling at Frank, but his gaze finally flickers over to Karen, who’s trying to look extremely interested in her cup of coffee. His whole demeanor changes immediately. “Oh my J. Lo, is this…?”

Next thing Karen knows, she’s scooting further into the booth, so the strange man can sit beside her. She looks at Frank, alarmed, who quickly says, “Karen, this is Mike,” he gestures to the man still standing, “And his boyfriend, Titus.” Titus is looking her up and down, appraisingly, his lips pursed together. “Mike and I have been working the same construction job, and sometimes Titus comes around to have lunch. Some of the other guys were giving them shit, so I told them to get lost…”

Karen quirks an eyebrow. “You told them to… get lost?” In the past, Frank telling someone to get lost could mean them getting put underground.

Frank shrugs. “Something to that effect.” At Karen’s look he mutters “Nothing permanent.”

Titus apparently has finished assessing Karen, because he interrupts “Girl, you should have seen it. It was like _The Bodyguard_ if Whitney Houston had been an interracial gay couple and Kevin Costner had been a construction worker with a busted-up nose. If I had had a camera, it would be a music video already.”

Frank moves over so Mike can sit down as well. Karen can already tell that Mike’s used to Titus’ energetic personality; his smile is fond, but a little exasperated at the same time. “I don’t know if it was _exactly_ like that,” he says, “But it was good to know someone had our backs.” Frank shrugs off the sentiment, looking out the diner window, but Karen can sense that he’s pleased. “Now the three of us grab breakfast, or lunch sometimes,” Mike says.

“When Frank’s not too busy romancing an all-star reporter! So, _you_ are _Karen Page_.” Titus leans forward and pushes a lock of her hair back over her shoulder. Out of the corner of her eye, Karen could swear Frank turns a shade of pink. “Oh my goodness, honey, he did not lie. You are giving me serious ‘Aphrodite comes out of a clam shell then goes to her sensible day job.’” Karen laughs; Titus’ enthusiasm is infectious, and it overwhelms any of her feelings of self-consciousness. 

“Um, thank you, I think? Yes, I’m Karen, Karen Page.” She holds out her hand but Titus bats it away, instead leaning forward to kiss her on each cheek.

“Of course you are, and Frank is garbage at introductions.” He gestures towards himself. “Titus Andromedon, actor, singer, YouTube sensation, future Beyoncé collaborator-slash-muse. And this is my Mikey, as you know he works with Frank, who I gather has NOT mentioned us, for which I will never forgive him and he’s not invited to the wedding.”

Frank looks at Titus with some surprise, and Mikey with utter panic. 

Titus sighs, exasperated. “HYPOTHETICAL wedding, boo, don’t have a heart attack.” He gives Karen a conspiratorial look. “Men, I swear to the Lord, how can we even.” Karen finds herself actually giggling.

The waitress behind the counter holding a brown take-out bag calls out: “Pick up order for Titus An—Andro… I’m not saying this. Pick up order for Titus?”

“Well, that’s us!” Titus says brightly, as though there might be another Titus Andro in the diner. He takes Karen’s hand. “K-Page, we simply have to see more of you. Double-date, your treat, whatever.” He nods towards Frank and says to Karen in a faux-whisper, “I know he’s a grumpy bitch, but he seems to have taken a shine to you, so we are supportive as hell.”

So far Frank hasn’t really even tried to get a word in edgewise, but at this he grunts “Alright, Titus, you guys get out of here.” His face still looks a bit pink, even the tips of his ears.

Mike and Titus stand up, Titus sweeping towards the counter to get their food as Mike gives Frank a firm handshake. “It was really nice to meet you, Karen,” Mike says, and she’s struck by the earnestness of it. “Frank’s a good guy.”

“Of course he is, isn’t that what I just said?” Titus says as he returns to link his arm through Mike’s. “We’ll let you get back to it, you crazy kids. Talk soon, love you!” And with that, the couple are out the door and into the fall sunshine.

Karen and Frank are silent for a moment, each taking a sip of their now-cold coffees.

Frank speaks first. “Ah, I know Titus can be kind of a whirlwind but… he means well.” He rubs at the stubble coming in on his jaw.

Karen tries to look disapproving for a moment, but quickly breaks into a smile. “I love him. And Mike seems like a great guy too.”

Frank looks at her sideways, as if to see if she means it, but he can tell that she does. “Good, good,” he says, turning his coffee mug slowly on the table between them. “Maybe we’ll have to take them up on that double-date thing, then.”

Turning a little pink herself, Karen hums in agreement. “I think we definitely will.”

 

 


End file.
